BY JE’DON HOLLOWAY-TALLEY | Special to the Birmingham Times
GERREN AND CARLA WHITLOCK SR.
Live: Pelham
Married: April 17, 2010
Met: October 2008, at Carla’s job at State Farm Insurance on Lakeshore Parkway. Her job was hosting an agency showcase, and Gerren, who lived and worked in Ridgeland, Mississippi, at the time, was considering a move to Birmingham and was there because he was interested in becoming a State Farm Agent.
Carla remembered one of her friends, Oriah, calling and saying, ‘Hey, did you see a guy at the showcase named Gerren?’ and I said ‘yes, why?’, and she said ‘What did you think?’, and I asked what am I supposed to think, because it was strictly business for me,” Carla recalled.
Oriah also called Gerren and “she asked me if I remembered seeing someone named Carla, and asked me if I was dating anyone at the time, and I was,” Gerren said. “But I told her I was open [to meeting someone new] because at that point in time, I was looking for my wife and I knew that the person I was seeing wasn’t going to be my wife. So Oriah gave me her phone number, but I did not call for a month.”
“It was okay. I wasn’t worried about it, I was busy anyway,” Carla laughed.
Gerren remembers calling Carla the day after the 2008 Presidential Election.
“… we talked for hours upon hours, and we talked every single day until that Friday when she called me and told me she was going to be going home to Muscle Shoals to attend a funeral in [Hayneville, Alabama, near Selma] and that her reception would be spotty … And I remember I missed talking to her so much that one day that we both vowed never to go a day without talking to each other again. Talk about knowing somebody is the one, I knew she was the one,” Gerren said.
First date: Mid-November 2008, at an Italian restaurant in Ridgeland, Mississippi. Gerren lived and worked in Ridgeland and Carla agreed to drive up for the date.
Gerren remembers wanting to look extra special for his first date with Carla and had a hair filler paint called ‘Bigen’ added to his hairline during his haircut. Gerren and Carla recall when the truth about his hairline came dripping down his forehead.
“It was a nice restaurant, it was candle lit, and I was pulling out all the stops. I pulled out her chair and sat down and began to perspire … And as the conversation was flowing and I was looking her in her eyes, all of a sudden she wasn’t looking in mine anymore,” Gerren laughed. “She was looking at my head and she made a gesture to wipe my forehead, and when I did I saw the paint on my finger tips and said ‘uh oh’ and excused myself from the table and went to the restroom and was horrified when I looked in the mirror. I thought the date was over for sure,” he said.
“It looked like black mascara was running down his forehead and the sides of his face,” Carla laughed.
“I was trying to be sexy and debonair and that brought me down to size,” Gerren laughed. “But the great thing was that Carla made me feel okay about it and told me she appreciated the sentiment of what I was trying to do, and we laughed it off.”
“At that point, the first date jitters were out the door,” Carla said.
“That [embarrassing moment] gave me a shot to be myself and win her heart by being myself because I was giving my all,” Gerren said.
“And after dinner, we went for a romantic walk and talked and laughed… we were holding hands and giggling like two teenagers,” Carla said.
The turn: November 2008, right before Thanksgiving. Gerren was in Frisco, Texas, at his brother Brian’s home for the holiday, and was on the phone with Carla when he shared that he had fallen in love with her. Carla shared that she felt the same and they became exclusive.
“For me, it was from the first call… I hung up that phone and said she was mine,” Gerren said. “So I had started tying my loose ends up before going to Texas because my whole focus was to find my wife, and once I determined that Carla was the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with … I didn’t want anything to jeopardize what I was building with her.”
“Gerren told me that he was exclusive with me from day one, but I and we were good to go,” Carla laughed.
The pair dated long distance as Carla lived in Birmingham, and Gerren lived and worked in Ridgeland, Mississippi as a network analyst for Jackson Public Schools and the US Air Force as an Non Destructive Inspection Specialist [NDI].
The proposal: On Carla’s birthday, Aug. 18, 2009, at a lounge in downtown Birmingham during her 30th birthday party.
“I invited all her friends and some of her relatives, and her mom had given me her blessing,” Gerren said. “And at a point in the night when she least expected it, I got down on one knee and proposed. She was taken aback, she immediately started crying, and said ‘yes’. And for the rest of the night she was in a corner with her coworkers and friends admiring the ring and everyone was telling her she did good [for bagging such a gent], and me how great I did on the ring.”
“This was the first time some of my friends were meeting him and they were very impressed and excited for us,” Carla said. “I was very excited. We had been talking about [getting married], but as a woman you just wonder when and if what you all are talking about is going to happen. So I was excited and surprised when he popped the question. All of a sudden, cameras were in my face and there was this beautiful ring and it was like, this is not a lifetime movie, this is really happening.”
The wedding: At PineTree Country Club in Birmingham, officiated by Pastor Leroy Sawyer, of Mount Moriah Primitive Baptist Church in Florence, Alabama. Their colors were apple green and wisteria [light purple], with soft touches of pink.
Most memorable for the bride was the vibrancy of the outdoors at her wedding venue. “I remember taking pictures out on the golf course on the green, and the green was so vibrant, the clouds were so white, the sky was so blue, and I remember the breeze on my face…,” Carla said. “We had a small wedding party because it was important to us to have an intimate wedding party … And it was great to see all of our family and friends really connecting and dancing and enjoying themselves.”
Most memorable for the groom was his prayers coming full circle. “The realization that everything that I wanted, the things that I put into the atmosphere and had been pursuing had materialized in the moment. Seeking to find my wife, marrying her and having our family and friends there to bear witness to it was extremely memorable for me,” said Gerren. “One thing I shared with Carla throughout the wedding planning process was that no matter what happened, no matter what came up, we were to remember our motto, which was that ‘this is light and easy’, and it kept us at peace.”
They honeymooned in Montego Bay, Jamaica, at Secrets Resorts.
Gerren enjoyed strengthening their connection and enjoying the excursions. Carla discovered that she was not very good at kayaking, “I kept capsizing us,” she laughed, “it was not my jam.”
Words of wisdom: “Remember what you said and what you shared when you were dating and continue to pursue those things together,” Gerren said. “Before getting married I interviewed other couples at different tenures in their marriage and I learned different things that could strengthen my marriage. I learned different strategies for different obstacles, and to seek help from others when I need advice because I did not have a positive model for marriage so I went to find it myself so that my marriage could be sustainable because proper planning prevents poor performance. Make sure you keep God first and be intentional about discovering your spouse as they evolve.”
Carla said, “Keep the main thing the main thing, and what I mean by that is your spouse and your covenant with God is your main thing is. Date [each other] as much as you can to keep that connection between the two of you so you don’t grow apart. Date with the kids, date without the kids, however you gotta do it, just keep on dating,” Carla said.
Happily ever after: The Whitlock’s attend New Rising Star Church, in east Birmingham, and have two children, Gerren II, 11, and Cayla, 9.
Carla, 45, is a Muscle Shoals native and Muscle Shoals High School grad. She attended Dillard University in New Orleans, Louisiana, where she earned a bachelor of art’s degree in business management, and is an Eastern Star. Carla works for a major insurance company as a field implementation coach.
Gerren, 40, is a Jackson, Mississippi native, and Forest Hill High School [Jackson, Mississippi] grad. He attends Morehouse College in Atlanta, where he is pursuing a bachelor’s degree in business administration with a concentration in management. He is an active Prince Hall Mason and served in the U.S. Air Force for eight years in the engineering division as an NDI Specialist. Gerren owns an independent firm Insurance Seekers in Birmingham.
“You Had Me at Hello’’ highlights married couples and the love that binds them. If you would like to be considered for a future “Hello’’ column, or know someone, please send nominations to Barnett Wright bwright@birminghamtimes.com. Include the couple’s name, contact number(s) and what makes their love story unique.
