by Charlene Holmes
Scenario one – You are happily married-with children and one day, poof! – you are in Divorce Court dividing the property and discussing child visitations.
Scenario two – your once sweet, satisfying relationship with your boyfriend or girlfriend turns sour, secretive and toxic.
Scenario three – You are simply married to your job which can be fulfilling, but lonely and totally unbalanced.
In each of these cases, people found themselves surprisingly single.
Ms. Abra Barnes, 34, identified with scenario three. She explained, “I started my career very young as a real estate agent.” She said she worked and socialized with her single friends, but one day her single friends no longer had the time to associate with her. Ms. Barnes said she was rudely awakened when she realized that her once single “friends were married with children.”
“They had their family vacations and date nights and I wasn’t invited, “Ms. Barnes added.
Surprisingly Single was created in October of 2012 as an entertainment means for professional single people between the ages of 25 to 50 (and older) to network, talk and do pressure-free things together. “We have outings for two people as well as 100 people at a time. We dialogue about being single and offer panel discussions about not being married and other topics. We offer speed dating, social outings such as bowling, horseback riding, sky diving, themed parties and eating out. It’s not about hooking up. We’re just trying to get people to get out of their comfort zones and meet people,” she said.
“We just want to fill voids. Friendships are being formed and some love matching is occurring also.”
Ms. Barnes continued, “In November of 2012, we started a Facebook Group called Surprising Single. One of our female members found herself stranded with a flat tire. She accessed her Facebook account and before she knew it, three guys were there to help her. We try to fill in the gaps for each other. We’re like a big family.”
She mentioned that there is a Surprising Single Clothing line. “Some of our shirts are printed with a Surprising Single sign across the chest. We guarantee you’ll get some kind of looks and conversation. It’s about boosting your ego. It’s okay to be single until you decide to get married – IF you decide to get married. In the meanwhile, why not form friendships and meet people? A simple hello can lead to limitless opportunities.” She reiterated, “We want to get people out to mingle with other people and give them opportunities to meet other people.”
During a recent Lock and Key party, men wore locks around their necks and ladies wore keys on their wrists. “We walked around to see which keys could open locks. There were drawings for movie and restaurant dates, horseback riding and winery certificates,” Ms. Barnes added.
This past Labor Day, Ms. Barnes said there was a Surprising Single Black and White soiree at the Regions Park Ballroom to launch the new website http://www.iamsurprisinglingsingle.com/. It was a great success. Surprising Single has a calendar of events, a store, love blog and ways to get restaurant discounts,” Ms. Barnes stated.
Ms. Barnes concluded, “Surprisingly Single also does a series called, “Preparing Yourself for Your Mate.” Within the series, we work on preparing singles financially, physically, mentally, socially and spiritually. As a veteran realtor, my favorite leg of the series is the financial leg. I push home ownership. A recurring hash tag that you will see among my 1000 members is #houses and spouses because not only am I going to help my singles find a spouse, but afterwards, I will put the two of them in a house!”
